This week I played a role in the fate of a six-hour baby, survived a midnight attack of carnivorous ants, and jumped out of a bus window.

I remember once when I was taking role for a class on AIDS and one girl would write "Lukia" as her first name one day, and "Rukia" the next. It unfailingly alternated. Spelling here is like the points on "Who's Line is it Anyway"; it just doesn't matter. So I shouldn't have been surprised when I asked the new mother her 6-hour-old baby's name, and the nurse recorded it without asking how it was spelled. Then, when I read aloud what she had written, she said "Oops! Oh well."

If I had woken up 20 minutes later, it probably would have been to the tune of ants munching away at my toes. Luckily, for some reason I scanned the wall, or what was visible of it under the wallpaper of ants, with my flashlight. Scanning the floor, I saw I would have to make a dash for the living room as they were starting to cover that too. Soon after my escape, they were marching across my bed as well. My entire courtyard was throbbing with them. Environmentalists, skip to the next paragraph: I draw the line at attacks in my bed. I had a spray can of Raid, and let loose on the ants, finally able to return to my bed about 2 hours after I was so rudely awakened.

Usually I like to pretend that I can blend in with a crowd here, but last Wednesday I didn't even try. The bus conductor's generally foul mood changed to astonishment when I motioned to him that instead of force my way through a thick crowd of people, chickens and donkeys (ok, no donkeys, but there could have been), I'd simply jump out the window when it came to my stop. The other passengers thought this was a riot. The pressure was on, and I worried a little bit about hurting myself or chickening out. Luckily, the only thing bruised in the process was my papaya.

For those who enjoyed the quizzes earlier, here's another:
Which of these have I carried on the back of my bike?
a. a kindergartener
b. 6 chickens
c. a pregnant woman and a baby
d. a Wisconsonian
e. an 80-year-old farmer
f. an 80-year-old nun

Here's a hint: There's only 1 wrong answer. Giving "liftis" is part of the culture here. I have never carried livestock on my bike (so letter b is out), but I can't say no if someone is walking down a hill that I am biking down. I wanted to ask the nun if I could try on her nun-hat (wimple?) but I was too shy. Probably for the better, but I couldn't help think that it would be a fair trade for the ride I gave her. There is constant controversy among non-nun villagers about what their hair looks like under there. I've never been friends with any nuns before I came to Tanzania, but the ones in my village are really cool. There's one who punches me in the arm if I say "Shikamoo"(the Kiswahili greeting of respect) instead of Kamwene (the tribal greeting) to her.